Marriage And The Trinity
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SERIES INTRODUCTION
Recently I remembered why I had stopped noticing the sounds of war during my deployment in Operation Iraqi Freedom. When we first entered the country, every cell in my body was on heightened alert. My adrenaline was constantly pumping. Every staccatoed rat-tat-tat from a distant AK-47 was enough to make my hair stand on end. Every civilian standing in the crowd could be a suicide bomber. Every vehicle could deliver the IED that would send me home looking forever like Lieutenant Dan. And with every mortar round fired, the reality of going home in a box and my mother receiving a triangle-folded American flag pressed upon my mind. Yet, as the deployment wore on, these sounds melded into a strange kind of normalcy for me.
For instance, every morning around 3 AM, the reverberating rumbles of incoming mortar rounds would agitate the little mud brick house we lived in. Those first nights in theater, I awoke in a great alarm from every blast, alert and ready for combat, frantically putting on my equipment for readiness and protection. But, once I realized that Iraqis with Mortar rounds could not hit the proverbial sand when falling off the fictional camel, I eventually learned to sleep right through the explosions as if nothing strange was happening around me.
The thunderous eruptions, once jarring to me, became the ethereal drum tap in the desert's lullaby. Time, like an ancient spell, wove its enchantment upon my senses, leaving me unconscious of my surroundings, which is what I believe has happened to the modern church.
In his timeless malice, Satan has assailed the sacred bond of marriage for so long that the sounds and signs of warfare upon her have faded into the cacophony of noises we have become accustomed to. While we have grown numb to the relentless onslaught at the devil's hand, divorce, infidelity, and broken homes have become the tapestry woven into the threads of our society.
For this reason, it is incumbent upon us to wake from our slumber, recognize the war, and cling to the weapons of warfare our compassionate General has assigned us. For all who call themselves Christians, it is time to rekindle our love for the hallowed Word. As followers of Christ, we must valiantly thwart the adversary's advances on marriage in general, and our marriages in particular, by embracing God's designs for us, our marriages, our children, and our homes that are revealed in Holy Scripture.
Today, we begin our series on marriage by traveling back to the genesis of it, seeking solace in the profound wisdom spoken by our God in His Word. In this collection of essays on the topic of marriage, we will lean into what Scripture teaches and glean from our Maker's timeless intention for marriage that will ever illuminate our path. Today, we begin by speaking about the design of marriage from the first Biblical text on marriage found in Genesis 1:26-28.
THE TEXT
26 Then God said, "Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; and let them rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over the cattle and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth." 27 God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. 28 God blessed them; and God said to them, "Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth, and subdue it; and rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over every living thing that moves on the earth." - Genesis 1:26-28
THE TRINITARIAN DESIGN OF MARRIAGE
The Bible describes the creation of man in marital language. For instance, God did not merely create two distinctly gendered individuals, calling them "very good" in their disconnectedness, but a pair of people who would become one flesh together. In the same way that shoes come in twos and socks come in pairs, God made man as a male and female unit that would join together to become one very glorious thing, which of course, was the "very good" part.
In this, we must also notice that the creation of man was a trinitarian event. God does not create the first domestic community without blueprints. Instead, he patterns it off the divine community that has existed forever. At the height of the creation enterprise, God speaks, saying, "Let Us make mankind in Our image" When God does this, it not only serves as proof for the triunity within the Godhead but the kind of intimacy God intends to be present in the marriage.
THE TRINITARIAN COMMUNITY
For all eternity, members of the Godhead, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit exist in perfect harmony and self-giving love, an exquisite dance of divine affection. This celestial community lives in exquisite blissful intimacy, lavishly pouring out fragrant love upon one another, heralding each other's praises in melodious harmonies that echoed across the unformed realms, holding nothing back from one another across eons of affectionate fellowship.
In the embrace of the Father, love emanates as an eternal wellspring, an outpouring of perfect affection towards the Son and the Spirit. The Father's love, boundless and unchanging, encapsulates the essence of nurturing care and tender compassion. It is a love that delights in the Son's obedience and wholeheartedly affirms His eternal Sonship, a love that seeks to glorify and honor the Son above all.
The Son, in response, reciprocates this love with perfect devotion and filial obedience. His passion for the Father is marked by complete surrender and an unwavering desire to fulfill the Father's will. It is a love that willingly steps into the realm of humanity, taking upon Himself the weight of the world's sin, offering Himself as the perfect sacrifice—a demonstration of love that knows no bounds.
The Holy Spirit, the breath and life within the Trinity, embodies the love that flows between the Father and the Son. It is a love that unites, empowers, and guides. The Spirit's love is like a gentle wind, constantly moving and animating the divine dance. It is a love that testifies to the unity and oneness of the Godhead, bringing forth the fruit of love in the hearts of believers.
Together, the love within the Trinity is a symphony of self-giving, perfect love. It is a love that transcends time and space, existing in timeless eternity. It is a love that invites us to behold the divine dance and participate in its harmonious rhythms. Through the love of the Trinity, we catch a glimpse of the infinite depth of love and are invited to enter into a transformative relationship with the Triune God, where we, too, can experience the boundless love that unites Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. This, of course, is best pictured in human marriage.
As many scholars and authors attest, when our triune God patterned man according to His image, He was undoubtedly creating individuals with a rational and creative capacity to think, feel, love, and do. But God was also making man a community of persons (Male and female) with whom it would not be suitable or good for them to be alone. Thus, that community, patterned off the Godhead, would possess an innate desire to enjoy, participate, and be satisfied by holy intimate fellowship that imitates the eternal inner trinitarian realities observed in God. Among humans, this finite expression, this intimate, joyful, loving, and sacrificial community, is what we call marriage, and it was created to image the community found within the Godhead.
THE TRINITARIAN COMMUNITY MARRIAGE
While that may be easily said, understanding what it means is an entirely different thing. Sure, marriages must image the Trinity, yes, and amen! But what does that mean? What will that look like? How will we progress in that? These are all valuable questions to consider.
And if we are going to get near an answer, we must first catch a glimpse of the divine community that human marriage was designed to resemble and imitate. If we want to understand how the marriage relationship functions, especially at the design level, we need to see how its designer engages in relationships and let that inform our theology and our practice of marriage.
In the ensuing discourse, it is neither feasible nor prudent to embark upon an exhaustive exposition, for we confront the enigma of an unfathomable deity whose essence transcends all human comprehension. So instead, I shall present a few concise examples, offering a glimpse into select facets that draw parallels between the Divine community and the institution of marriage with an elucidation of their practical implications.
LOVE: At the core of the Trinity resides an eternal and impeccable affection—a boundless, unreserved, and unblemished love shared in perfect unity among the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Similarly, in the sacred covenant of matrimony, love assumes a foundational role, demanding its unfaltering presence between husband and wife. Just as the divine persons mutually love and selflessly care for one another, so are spouses called to emulate a self-sacrificial love and unwavering care for their marital partner.
UNITY: The members of the Trinity exemplify a sublime state of perfect unity, seamlessly embodying their divine essence and purpose. Analogously, in the institution of marriage, unity assumes paramount significance as husband and wife merge into a harmonious union, becoming, in essence, one flesh. They are enjoined to diligently pursue a godly and Biblically aligned unity, aligning their lives' overarching direction and purpose and committing to unwavering fidelity throughout their shared lifetime.
SUBMISSION: The interrelationships within the Godhead unveil a symphony of mutual submission and harmonious concord. The Son willingly submits to the will of the Father, and the Holy Spirit proceeds forth from the Father and the Son. Likewise, within the sacred bond of marriage, the principle of mutual submission finds expression as both husband and wife reverently yield to one another, motivated by love and mutual respect, while the husband assumes the mantle of servant leadership, offering guidance and stewardship to his family.
SELFLESSNESS: Within the Trinitarian fellowship, an ethos of selflessness permeates every interaction, as each divine person ardently seeks the glorification and exaltation of the others. Analogously, in the realm of matrimony, selflessness assumes a pivotal role, with both partners intently prioritizing the needs and aspirations of their spouse above their own.
INTIMACY: The Trinity partakes in an intimate, boundless communion—a sacred fellowship unmarred by boundaries or reservations, characterized by perfect knowledge and unceasing bliss. Analogously, intimacy assumes a crucial dimension in the sanctity of marriage, encompassing emotional, spiritual, and physical closeness between spouses. It engenders an environment of trust, vulnerability, and profound understanding, mirroring the intimate dynamics witnessed within the Godhead.
FAITHFULNESS: Within the eternal bond of the Trinity, a tapestry of unparalleled dedication weaves the divine Persons together, unfailingly loyal, pure in devotion, and unblemished by the need for improvement or apology. Similarly, faithfulness assumes a paramount role in the institution of marriage, embodying unwavering commitment, steadfast loyalty, and resolute devotion throughout the sacred union. Just as the Trinitarian members epitomize unwavering faithfulness to one another, so are spouses called to manifest unswerving faithfulness and devoted constancy within the sanctity of matrimony.
COMMUNICATION: At the heart of the Trinitarian mystery lies perfect and complete communication, a divine exchange that has resonated with unbridled joy since the dawn of eternity. Before the inception of time and space, the divine Persons have engaged in celebratory, harmonious, and passionate dialogue. Effective communication assumes a pivotal role in the covenantal fabric of marriage, nurturing understanding, harmonizing conflicts, and fostering mutual growth. Spouses are encouraged to cultivate an atmosphere of open, honest, and respectful communication, enriching their relational dynamics in alignment with the divine example.
COMPLEMENTARITY: The Trinity embodies a harmonious symphony of distinct roles and functions, seamlessly interwoven within the divine essence. Analogously, the sacred institution of marriage encompasses a complementary interplay between husband and wife, wherein their unique strengths, gifts, and roles converge to establish a balanced and flourishing relationship. This complementarity, far from implying inequity, embodies an appreciation for the diverse contributions each spouse, divinely ordained, brings to the union, fostering a unity that echoes the Trinitarian harmony.
SACRIFICE: The Triune God embodies sacrificial love in its purest form, as the Father dispatched the Son to pour out His life for the redemption of humanity, and the Son willingly embraced the ultimate sacrifice. Within the sacred covenant of marriage, sacrificial love finds its embodiment through selfless affection and the deliberate relinquishment of personal needs for the spouse's sake. It entails acts of self-sacrifice and intentional choices that prioritize the well-being and flourishing of the beloved. Moreover, the husband assumes Christ-like sacrificial leadership, mirroring Christ's profound love for His church.
FORGIVENESS, MERCY, AND GRACE: Within the divine communion of the Trinity, sin, transgression, and the need for forgiveness, mercy, and grace find no dwelling place. Yet, God, perfect in every facet, reveals Himself as a God of forgiveness, compassion, and grace, extending these divine attributes to fallen humanity, recipients of His undeserved favor. Though spouses bear inherent imperfections within the sacred tapestry of marriage, they are called to emulate the divine example by extending forgiveness, showing mercy, and bestowing grace upon one another. Recognizing their own frailty, they also unite in a shared endeavor to grant forgiveness, demonstrate understanding, and extend grace to their covenant children, reflecting the divine paradigm set forth by their heavenly Father.
TRUST: Trust stands as a foundational pillar within the Trinitarian relationship. The Father, Son, and Holy Spirit exemplify unwavering belief in one another, relentless in their devotion and unyielding in their fidelity. Likewise, trust assumes paramount significance within the sacred covenant of marriage. Spouses are called to cultivate a profound trust in one another, relying upon the steadfastness of their partner's faithfulness and finding solace in the unwavering commitment and love they share.
PERSEVERANCE: The members of the Trinity showcase unwavering determination in pursuing their divine purposes and plans. Within the realm of marriage, perseverance becomes an indispensable virtue, enabling couples to navigate the challenges and hardships that arise along their shared journey. Spouses are summoned to embody steadfast determination in their commitment, love, and relentless pursuit of a flourishing relationship, even when confronted with the trials that beset them.
WISDOM: Infinite wisdom and perfect understanding grace the members of the Trinity. In the context of marriage, wisdom assumes a paramount role, guiding couples in making sound decisions, navigating conflicts with grace and humility, and seeking divine guidance in all facets of their union. Couples are urged to pursue wisdom together, anchoring their decisions in the timeless truths of God's Word and seeking wise counsel when needed.
FRUITFULNESS: Abundant fruitfulness permeates the divine work and purposes within the Trinity. Similarly, within the covenant of marriage, couples are called to embrace a multifaceted fruitfulness, encompassing not only the physical procreation of offspring but also extending to their shared endeavors of building a family, serving others, and leaving a lasting impact on the world around them.
JOY: Perfect and boundless joy characterizes the eternal fellowship of the Trinity. Joy is vital in nurturing a vibrant and thriving relationship within the sacred bond of marriage. Couples are encouraged to cultivate happiness in their shared experiences, cherishing moments of celebration, finding delight in life's simple pleasures, and fostering an atmosphere of joyous contentment that permeates their union.
ETERNITY: The relationship within the Trinity transcends the confines of time, embracing an eternal nature without beginning or end. In marriage, spouses are called to mirror this eternal perspective, committing themselves to a lifelong partnership that reflects the enduring nature of love and fidelity. Guided by the everlasting covenant they enter into, couples are encouraged to anchor their union in the timeless principles and values that reflect the eternal nature of their bond.
CONCLUSION
A multi-volume work could and likely should be written on the comparisons between the Trinity and human marriage. But, more than being exhaustive in this post, my hope was simply to demonstrate that this reality was not by accident but by design, which sprang forth the moment God said: "Let Us make man (male and female) in Our image" (Gen. 1:26). Knowing this, the question we must wrestle with is what picture is my marriage imaging? Is my marriage pointing to the magnificent character of God, the glory of His inner Trinitarian love, and the beauty and selflessness of His divine intimate communion? Or is my marriage telling the story of chaos, selfishness, and misery? No marriage will tell that story perfectly, but every marriage is saying something. Take some time today. Diagnose your marriage. And have the courage to repent where necessary.
As you fight for your marriage today and seek to grow up into this glorious institution, remember that the enemy hates what marriage represents. Think about it this way, if the enemy hates God, and everything that reminds Him of God, then is it any wonder that he so despicably detests marriage, since it is dripping with the designs and attributes of almighty God? Marriage was not patterned off our opinions and it does not exist to advance our preferences. Instead, God made marriage to reflect the holy, eternal, loving, intimate, joyful, and sacrificial love He has always cherished among the members of the Godhead. In that sense, marriage is not about you but is certainly for you. God has invited you to participate in and imitate His triune love. Perhaps this is why Scripture calls marriage the "mystery of the Gospel" because, unlike any other human relationship or institution, it most clearly and most beautifully pictures the divine.
Join us next week as we look at another critical aspect of marriage, but until then, love God with all you’ve got, love your spouse in a way that showcases God’s Triune love, and spend your days cultivating great joy!
God bless you!
